Saturday, November 22, 2008

Finally, Something to Say!!

Okay, America, after many weeks of silence I finally have something to say. I have found my voice and I have lots to post about.


I must start off by formally announcing that the 2nd grade Cougars beat the pants off of the Vikings today (32-13) in their first ever playoff game. In an act of good sportsmanlike conduct I hugged the Vikings coach, who was once a friend of mine, and said, in a sincere voice, "I am so sorry we kicked your tail today." He took it very well, I think.
The Cougars will play the Bobcats in the championship game on December 6th and we are all pretty excited. I would say that the Cali friends should come in for the game, but this is expensive and they are only 7. You have many years ahead of you to come watch my son snap a ball in between his legs with his head upside down and deliver it perfectly to the QB every time. Tempting isn't it!?! If you can't make it, we'll send you the DVD!






There has been so much happening in between football games and practices. We will begin with Sophie's 5th birthday party. It was a Hello Kitty Extravaganza. She asked for a Hello Kitty party at home and she wanted our friend, Mr. Rod, (KZ Rod from KCBI) to do his puppet show for the kids. Rod makes puppets out of things like vacuum cleaner hoses, wrapping paper tubes and random stuff. The kids go crazy. They absolutely love it. She also wanted his 11 year old son, Benjerben (Benjamin), to have a sword fight with Landry. A duel, as it were, over her friend, Sara. She talked about it for months. I just kind of ignored this request, since I thought it was kind of stupid and hoped that she would forget it. But Ben, in his preciousness, showed up prepared. Instead of a sword fight, Benjerben did a magic show for the kids. It was perfect. He finished it up and Sophie came to me and said, "So, when is the sword fight?" I promptly introduced her to another helping of cake.


The party was great. All the kids had their faces painted like kitty's. They had kitty ears (compliments of my mother). They made kitty cupcakes (compliments of my mother). They ate kitty cake and kitty ice cream and opened kitty presents and then we all threw up kitties and passed out on the floor. Actually, it went very smoothly (compliments of my mother :).


So, now that Sophie is five I must tell you the excellent things she has learned in the past three weeks. I am warning you, this is not for the faint of heart or the home schooled...



1. You may not color your entire leg with an orange marker.
2. It is not okay to cut yourself some bangs.
3. It is inappropriate for a 5 year old to tell their brother, or anyone for that matter, that you are going to kick their ass.
4. Pecker means wiener and it is not a nice word especially when you are singing about peckers to the tune of deep and wide. ie. "pecker and pecker, pecker and pecker there's a mountain flowing with peckers and peckers." If there is a mountain flowing with peckers, I do not want to go there!!!
5. Nothing surprises your mother any more.


What's funny is, she is so embarrassed about all of these things. She does not want me to tell anyone anything that she says or does. I would respect this request of hers if it wasn't for the c-section scar on my stomach that gives me the right to say anything I want to anyone I want for the rest of my life. And if she keeps being so danged funny I will keep invoking that right!!!!

10 comments:

Alpha 1 Vann Clan said...

I promise --I will never ever tell Sophie that I know all her secrets. I will especially never tell her how I learned about them....
Kim

Alpha 1 Vann Clan said...

I forgot to say--That is the cutest birthday cake--ever.

Anonymous said...

TESSA. You. Have. Outdone. Yourself. For real.

P.S. Will is struggling that he was unable to attend aforementioned kitty party. I reminded him that Sophie was AWOL during his Airborne Ranger party.

Jaynie

Anonymous said...

you are too funny. I checked your blog from china. I'm glad you found your voice again!!

Thanks for loaning us your mom for a couple of weeks.

Love you...
Mara

Kristy said...

Ok - WOW on the party. Pecker story, HILARIOUS!!

Anonymous said...

WHEW!!! thanks for the parental guidance warning before I read this aloud to my precious, innocent, saint of a homeschooled child. I'll take her innocence a little longer, maybe we don't need siblings! I probably needed to close my ears as well :) I didn't know the word "ass" until highschool, how does one learn that so young? I still don't know the "pecker" word, are there peckers, what is a pecker, I've never seen a pecker. Did you mean pickle? :) Tammy

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